


The Wheels on the Bus

by eeyore9990



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Future Fic, Kid Fic, M/M, Married Couple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-06-03 16:49:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6618517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eeyore9990/pseuds/eeyore9990
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek volunteers to ride along with the students on the bus when his daughter's preschool class goes on a field trip to a local farm.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Wheels on the Bus

**Author's Note:**

> I had to do this today (chaperone a preschool class field trip) and let me tell you... I hate that fucking song.

They’ve barely been on the bus for five minutes when Derek snaps. The ~~horrible~~ _adorable_ little girl with red ribbons in her hair – to match her ~~red, red blood~~ school shirt – has just ~~bared her teeth~~ smiled big and bright at him before drawing air into her lungs in preparation for belting out the twentieth verse of _Wheels on the Bus._

The enemy outnumbers him ten to one. Well, it could be argued that it’s ten to two, but the clueless teacher driving the preschool bus is A) driving (and therefore of no use in this situation) and B) smiling happily … which can only mean that she’s already fallen over the cliff into screaming psychosis.

No sane adult can withstand that much _Wheels on the Bus_ with a smile.

“Who,” Derek says through his teeth, feeling his chest rumbling with a bit of growl, “wants. To hear. A story.” He doesn’t frame it as a question. He’s not stupid enough to give them choices.

The little boy behind him who’d spent the entire journey with a finger firmly lodged in his right nostril, looks straight at him, smirks, and kicks the back of Derek’s seat. When the boy’s face goes slack and his mouth drops open in shock, Derek realizes he’s flashing his eyes at the kid. 

Oops.

An eighteen wheeler chooses that moment to pass the school bus, sending all ten preschoolers into screaming, squealing fits of delight. A vein in Derek’s temple explodes in reaction to the piercing sound.

“Mister Jadyn’s dad?”

Derek swivels his head just enough to meet the gaze of the little girl holding hands across the narrow aisle with his daughter. He can’t remember her name for the life of him, but he feels himself relax just a tiny bit. “Yes?” he asks, forcing his voice into gentle tones.

“I have a story to share.” Then, without waiting for anything like permission, the little girl starts up a story that begins with Once Upon a Time, meanders through Goldilocks and the Three Bears, circles around to the Three Little Pigs and then somehow dwindles off into a scrunched nose and lifted shoulders when a dozen kittens with mittens show up. “I forgot the rest,” she finally admits, twisting the fingers of her free hand into the hem of her dress before yanking it over her face to shield her from her classmates. 

“That’s okay, Sarah Beth!” Jadyn announces loudly, squeezing the little girl’s fingers in her own. “I liked your story!” Then she cups her hand beside her mouth and leans as close to Sarah Beth as her seat restraints will allow before whisper-shouting, “My daddy knows Little Red Riding Hood!”

One little boy’s eyes go big and round before he announces, “My daddy knows Little Red Riding Hood too!” 

That sets off the rest of the group, who rush to assure him that their parents are equally knowledgeable of nursery tales. Loudly and dramatically, until their high voices are bouncing off the metal and glass of the bus. 

Some little fucker starts to sing, “Ohhh, the…wheels on the–” 

“Once upon a time!” Derek says, voice raised to drown out theirs. He ignores the way the little girl near the front glares and covers her ears. “There lived a little girl who was so nice and so smart that everyone who knew her loved her.” 

“Was she so pretty?” 

“Ugh! This is a _girly_ story.” 

Derek’s eye twitches. “She was beautiful on the inside, which is the only thing that matters,” he grumbles, not surprised that the little girl who asked after the prettiness of the story’s character is wearing lipstick. And eye shadow. 

She’s _four._

The little boy who’s grumpily slouched in his seat after declaring this a girly story, he just ignores. 

“The little girl had a cape with a hood made of red velvet that she wore everywhere, so people called her Red Riding Hood. Her grandmother, who lived in the forest–” 

“Like the Preserve!” Jadyn shouts excitedly, then bites her lip at his quelling look. “Sorry for interrupting, Daddy.” 

Derek softens a little, nodding his acceptance of her apology before continuing. “Her grandmother was very ill – that means ‘sick’,” Derek explains to a child whose brow wrinkled at the word. “So Red Riding Hood gathered some soup and medicine and set off on the path to her grandmother’s house.” 

Derek’s got the kids under his spell now, all of them listening to the story, even if they fidget restlessly while he tells it. They’re _four._

“As she walks along the path, it begins to grow hot. It gets so hot that Red Riding Hood feels faint and dizzy. Just then, she looks up and sees a wolf.” 

“The wolf eats her up, gobble gobble!” the boy who’d protested the story exclaims. 

Jadyn whirls toward him, little mouth pinched in anger. “Wolves don’t eat people, William!” 

Heading off a fight, Derek speaks Jadyn’s name in a softly chastising tone. She sets her jaw, shoots a death-glare at the boy, but finally settles again. 

“The wolf, who’d been hidden in the shady part of the forest, saw Red Riding Hood stumble and crept forward. Wolves are afraid of people, you see, because people hunt them, but since Red was just a little girl, the wolf decided to help her. The wolf walked up to Red and took her cape into his mouth, pulling gently until she began to follow him. He pulled and pulled until she found herself beside a clear, clean stream, where she drank the cool water until she was refreshed.” 

Derek steadies himself as the bus turns off the main road onto a smaller one and a glance outside tells him they’ve got at least five minutes until they reach their destination. 

“The wolf waited with Red until she was better, then led her back to the path. Red was so thankful that she hugged the wolf and promised to help him should he ever need it. Twice more that day, the wolf helped Red find the stream when she felt too hot. By the time she got to her grandmother’s house, it was beginning to grow dark.” 

Derek notices that the kids aren’t even twitching, too enthralled with his story to so much as swing their feet. 

“Red knocked on her grandmother’s door and called out who it was before going inside and giving her grandmother the soup and medicine. Later that night, Red heard a scratching noise at the door and opened it to see the wolf with an arrow in his side. The hunters had caught him.” 

There’s a chorus of small gasps, and Sarah Beth has tears in her eyes, so Derek rushes to finish. 

“Red pulled the arrow free and bandaged the wolf, remembering her promise to him. When the hunters knocked at the door, she threw her cape over the wolf to hide him and told the hunters he was not there.” 

“She nursed the wolf – and her grandmother – back to health. From that day forward, Red and the wolf were the best of friends, helping each other whenever they were in need.” 

“Did they all live happily ever after?” a little girl who has Star Wars light up shoes asks. 

“Of course they did,” Derek says, smiling softly. 

The bus jolts and shudders as it turns onto the large patch of crushed gravel that serves as a parking lot for the farm the children are visiting. The Jeep is already there, Stiles leaning against it as he watches the bus pull in with a smile on his face. 

Once Derek has helped all the kids unstrap themselves – even the little bastard who’d kicked his seat – and watched them fling themselves off the bus, he slowly exits himself, directly into the arms of his husband, who is only laughing a little. 

“Jadyn said you told the kids our story,” Stiles murmurs, rubbing a soothing hand down Derek’s back. 

Derek just mumbles about the various injustices of the world. 

Stiles hums and sways until Derek feels steadier, both of them listening as the teacher herds the class toward one of the farm’s employees – Anna C., Anna M., and Anna S. all lined up in order. Then Stiles tilts his head up just a bit and softly sings, “The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'rrrgnuck!” 

“No one will ever find your body,” Derek whispers lovingly, wide palm cutting off Stiles' flow of words as his husband laughs helplessly. 


End file.
